The fam.

These are a couple lj posts about my ridiculous family.


Story 1, Robby has a cute ass.
June 18, 2006
Definately glad to be home on fathers day. Regardless of how much my family might irritate me, I do miss them. We had a barbeque at my grandparents house today and it was very enjoyable...I'm pretty close with most of my family so any time I can spend with them is good. Sarcasm emminates from these people. my people. I love it. There's also some unchecked sexual tension. this is a snippet of a conversation between my uncle rob and grandma:
"careful robby, don't get your pants dirty"
"(chuckles) oh no I wouldn't want to do that. these are my second best pair of jeans"
"well I think they look nice"
"It's just the way I fill them out"
"You do have a cute ass, robby"


Story 2, STOLED ***note, this is basically the first story I ever told my boyfriend about my family, and he still agreed to meet them all at once, a month after this story took place, which was less than two weeks after we began dating officially. He's a trooper.
December 17, 2006
**this story has been edited for content. it has been reformatted to fit your tv screen.
Let me give you the background on this story. My little brother stole "tomatoes" from my parents. Yeah, I know. We're not trashy. really. But my parents "eat tomatoes", and apparently my brother thought they just wouldn't notice if he 'borrowed' some for his buddies. Idiot.

This is a conversation between my mother and I:
Mom: It's not so much that he's "eating tomatoes" it,even though I would rather he didn't, it's that he stoled from us.
Me:whoa mom. hold on...andy did what to the "tomatoes"?
Mom: well, he stoled it
Me: no mom. andy never stoled anything.
Mom: YES HE DID
Me:no mom, he STOLE it. stoled is not, and has never been, a word
Mom: yes! yes it is. stoled, that's the past of stealing.
Me: no mom, stole. I stole a bike. andy stole your "tomatoes". stole
Mom: no, that's not right. it's stoled.
Me: mom, I drove home today. I didn't droved.
At this point my mom is going through the dictionary, and when she looks to my dad for support he shakes his head at her, because STOLED IS NOT A WORD.
Mom: you guys are going to get so much shit when I prove this to you.
Me and Dad: no, no we're not. because...you're wrong.
By now, my mom is on the page containing the verb, 'to steal'. She starts reading "stolen" to us like that's what she was saying. We don't let her get away with it. She then grabs a pen and adds a 'd' to the word "stole" in the dictionary, closes it and says "it's in there now."