uh, what's up August? (and also, a bit of a rant)

Working Monday through Friday has the bizarre side effect of making time fly so fast that you're not even really sure what year it is, let alone what month. My days feel about 30 years long but my weeks and months are blinks.

I think it’s because I'm always just trying to get through five days, 4 days, three days, holy shit it’s Thursday, oh Christ only 8 more hours…until the weekend. And then it’s Monday and I need facebook photos to even prove to myself that I did indeed have a weekend.

Which brings me to…how the FUCK is it August? Seriously. My mind is blown by this. Not only is it August but the month is almost half over. It makes me afraid that I’m going to wake up tomorrow and be thirty and not know how it happened.

Most of me wants to run away to a country where they won’t turn me over for defaulting on all of my debt and just wait tables and live in shitty little apartments and have adventures and be stinking poor. The other part of me says knock it off crazy face. That part is winning. What I really need is to win the lottery and pay off all of my debt so that if I want to be a crazy face I can (first I'd have to buy a lottery ticket). There are just way too many strings attached to me right now and it sucks. I can’t even join the Peace Corps/WOOF/other-awesome-opportunity-abroad because I’d have no way of paying on my credit cards/private student loans/ car while I was gone.

As terrible as I am at being an adult, in other ways I’m also way too good at it. Too settled, too responsible. In a few weeks I’ll start my internship which will take up my weekends. Super excited to be working towards a career that I actually want but also hating that my limited adventure time is going to be eaten up by more responsible adult activity (and unpaid at that).

So basically, this is me complaining about things I can't change (existing debt) and things I could change but won't (being a big fat chicken/taking on an internship). Just complaining. Sometimes you have to, you know?

I googled 'stock photo office worker'

NO. Absolutely not. Nobody working in an office looks like that unless they all stopped working to talk about the tiger tattoo their boss has on his hip or perhaps the 90's dance music video that their other boss appeared in briefly.

Now, that's more like it. I feel you, Danica (totally could be her name right?). I feel you.