Ridderbuschisms

So I'm living at home for 6 months. Took some sucking up of the pride and also a storage space crammed wall to wall with all of my shit but I will be saving money and paying things off and then in July moving in with the loves of my life. Also known as these people:


Honestly every time I think about it I nearly explode from all of the happy.

Anyway, for now I am with the parents, or my new room mates as some refer to them.
I love them dearly and am eating great food and my dog couldn't be happier.

There is, however, a certain amount of absurdity involved in spending time with my family. I will be documenting these little moments-the morsels of funny/ridiculous/yeah RIGHT?

Really REALLY unfortunately I can't read my notes from Christmas. There is a scribble that says "Corny=Horny". There is another that just says "White Christmas".
I'm sure they are amazing stories. In the future I need to write more clearly or be more on top of sharing these moments. The only note that actually made sense to me was the one that said "White Candy Cane".
White Candy Cane:
Years and years ago my mom bought a box of plain white candy canes to hang from the tree. They're really pretty, actually. We pack them up every year just like the rest of the decorations. They've held up quite well. This Christmas, my brother was opening one of his gifts and found a candy cane in the bag. Thinking it was just a little extra cheer from my mom, he unwrapped and bit into the candy cane. He looks up with the most confused/horrified expression on his face and mumbles with his mouth full "...mom did you put a candy cane in my present?" She says no and someone thinks to ask what color the candy cane was. "White," he mumbles. We all start laughing at him as he chews in a manner that would be much more appropriate for bubble gum than candy canes. It had fallen off the tree and into the bag. I hear 2001 was a good candy cane year. Aged to an ideal soft chewiness.
My brother and I, back when he was scared of me.



One more morsel:
Yesterday my mother and I were bickering and I told her I wouldn't be giving names of other individuals who shared my opinion about whichever specific bit of crazy we were arguing about. "Well, why NOT?" she asked. I told her that I didn't think it was fair to unleash her wrath onto unknowing victims. "I don't have a FUCKING wrath" was her response. Need I go on?

...love you mom